For all my moaning about Thanksgiving, it turned out quite nice. Lunch, well, in my opinion, lunch at the Casino near the race track with TVs blaring on every table, was NOTHING like Thanksgiving. And for me, this year,that was what I needed. Because I think if it would have been more like Thanksgiving, I would have been more upset that I wasn't cooking for my family like I had wanted too ( Happy Holidays My ... ) And I miss my family - not just my immediate family, but my grandparents. I'll look at Lil Man and sometimes my heart will just ache because I know they would have loved him so much. And I know they would enjoy the funny antics that we've gone through (and will go through). And I ache that he won't get to know them like I did. And the holidays, well the holidays can make the ache a little deeper. It can make the loss feel a little greater. And it's hard not to let the sadness overwhelm the happiness sometimes. So as most holidays, I shed some tears.